Love is a Verb

Day 3 of National Foster Care Month: Love

One year ago we finalized the adoption of our son — Teddy. 🤍 Words can not describe the fierce love I have for him. My son. Forever.

Loving a biological child seems so “easy.”  It’s obvious. Natural. With our biological children, the love starts early and grows. We’ve prayed for their pregnancies, anticipated their arrival… loved them from the very second we knew about them. No one ever questions how we could love a child that is born to us.

The love for foster and adopted children is formed differently, but in so many ways, it’s just the same. We didn’t anticipate these children. We never knew who was going to come or when. We’ve been given 45 minutes to 24 hours to prepare our hearts before meeting a new child who would be in our care. But with each child, the Lord did something miraculous.

We knew that in order to foster, our capacity would need to expand. So we asked the Lord to grow us however we needed to grow. And of course, He did. The love for these kids comes fiercely and all at once. From the very second we know about them, we love them. We pray for them. Our hearts break for them. We are deeply invested in their life and story.

It’s puzzling, really. And I don’t think you can understand the capacity to love another persons child until it happens. Getting a placement call or text with a few details about a child and the heartbreaking reason they need a home — the Lord breaks my heart open every single time.

The “connection” or “warm fuzzies” don’t always come right away, and that’s okay. That kind of attachment takes time. It’s learned. Grown. But the love, in my experience, isn’t based on those feelings. Love is a verb. It’s something I choose. By investing. Protecting. Advocating. Nurturing. Fighting for the connection. Fighting for the attachment. Knowing each of these children is loved by their Heavenly Father, and allowing Him to work through me to show them that.

Thank you, God, for trusting these children to be with me in my home. And for expanding my heart’s capacity in more ways than I could imagine.